Monday, July 27, 2009

My Text Log


My new short term goal is to get on mydrunktexts.com. Juvenile, I know but this is yet another thing I am obsessed with. I can be on this site for an hour at a time reading all the dumb texts college kids send to each other. I can't get enough.

I am determined to make it on this site! I make submit texts daily. Sometimes I even reword them to make it funnier. (Most of the time they aren't even drunk texts...just random things my friends send me that if anyone else read they would assume alcohol was involved.) So far I have had no luck but I remain hopeful. If you're ever really bored and looking for a cheap laugh then it's definitely something I would recommend checking out.

I've composed a list of some of my favorites...my texts will make it onto the world wide web somehow damnit! Here is a peek into my inbox.

"This creepy chick is staring at me from her window. She's a fat grape."

"I made another terrible decision...several times while watching Sin City."

"He walked into the party and said 'dibs'. I can't believe I went home with this douche!"

"I'm thinking about shaving before I go out tonight but I'm not sure the razor burn is worth the risk?"

"I'm at the Waffle Shop with him and I have the same shirt on that I wore to the bar last night. The old people think I'm his whore."

"Take one for the team...come up and check on me in 5 minutes but then go back downstairs and tell him I passed out on the toilet. Hopefully that will turn him off."

"I need a hobby that does not involve the internet. Even I'm beginning to get creeped out by my own facebook stalking."

"I just woke up alone on an air mattress with my ex's pillow and blanket. I hate my life."

17 comments:

Medora said...

I love this - how fun! I am so glad there was no such thing as texting/cell phones when I was an undergrad, out drinking and making an idiot of myself. I wouldn't want to have a record of it. I need to investigate this further . . .

rxBambi said...

ditto medora and not wanting to have a record of it! Yikes! The facebook stalking comment is the best!

Sarah K said...

that website reads like my F'ing diary. i submitted one and was snubbed!!

cum out! hitting on unemployed mem.its the life!

it was all true! he really was unemployed for many months. maybe the grammar and punctuation turned them off? maybe "texts from last night.com" will take us? *sniff*

Hit 40 said...

Life will suck in a couple weeks when we are back to school. We both have too much time on our hands.

Mike said...

I need a hobby that does not involve the internet! HAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Mango Girl said...

Thank you ~ thank you so much for providing me with something else to occupy my time...like I don't have enough things to do already. Great. Guess I should go ahead and quit my new job now as it will certainly interfere with my new reading.

Miss OverThinker said...

This is going to be perfect at work, when I am pretending to be busy.. BTW, I left a comment on your last post but don't see it there, did you delete it?

Jaime said...

i'm so glad that this site didn't exist when i was in college... i'm pretty sure my material would have been ALL over that page

Liz Mays said...

Those are completely hilarious! I love the fat grape one the most. :)

Midtown Girl said...

I have to check this one out! Another site that i'll read for hours - LOL!

I did a post as well on texts from last night - one of my favs!

http://www.midtowngirl.com/2009/05/comic-relieffunniest-site-ever.html

Stacy Uncorked said...

Reminds me of the funky random tweets I sent from my cell phone when I was on vacation and had no internet connection...and I wasn't even drunk! Ooops! ;)

Loved them all - now I'm going to have to check out that site...thanks for adding another thing I'll spend too much time on...heh, heh! ;)

Rebel Mother said...

Ha! Love the first one - she's a fat grape!

A fat grape!!!

Fab

RMxx

Joanie said...

The letter basically says her time away (she was in Portland,OR for nearly a week) and she's no different. still the same mean, selfish bitch she's been for the past 5 years. and I can't wait for her to go away to college.

JennyMac said...

so ill yet so very comical. The dibs one is the best. Are you kidding me?

The Peach Tart said...

I love some of these. I'll have to check it out.

Rebel Mother said...

Hello! Tagged you for a Meme over at mine. Hopw you can do it!

RMxx

BALLET NEWS said...

brilliant idea, thank you